Nurse 3D (2013) **
D: Doug Aarniokoski
C: Paz de la Huerta, Katrina Bowden, Corbin Bleu, Judd Nelson, Michael Eklund, Martin Donovan, Niecy Nash, Adam Herschman, Kathleen Turner, Melanie Scrofano, Boris Kodjoe
Plot Synopsis: A young woman (de la Huerta) lives a double life working as a nurse at a prestigious hospital by day and moonlighting as a serial killer who targets married men by night. Things get complicated when she falls for a co-worker (Bowden), who ultimately rejects her.
Review: About 40 minutes into Nurse, I was almost ready to proclaim it as a cult classic waiting to happen, almost. The main character, played by Paz de la Huerta, engages in one ridiculously, over the top murder set piece after another while outfitted in ridiculously, over the top costumes. Obviously, this is a film that is NOT going for subtlety.
Paz de la Huerta looks like a Playboy pinup only covered in lots of blood and gore. She camps it up like no other in a go for broke performance. Nurse 3D knows that it's pure and utter trash. Instead of shying away from the material's inherent trashiness, Nurse 3D embraces that and is always trying to constantly one up itself with one ridiculously outrageous situation after another.
Things are fun for awhile, but then something goes wrong. Out of nowhere, the film shifts into its third act, the grand finale. Right then and there, I could put my finger on places where it felt like important scenes were missing. For those that are unaware, Nurse 3D was shot in 2011. The film struggled to obtain an R rating from the MPAA, thus forcing the film's producers to constantly re-edit the film. The film was subject to further controversy due to Katrina Bowden having a no nudity clause in her contract. This forced the film's producers to re-edit scenes in which she supposedly appeared nude. With all these re-edits going on, who knows what got lost along the way?!?
And that's a shame too! The film's finale offers up a glorious set piece in which the main character turns her place of employment into a grisly bloodbath. It's one of the most outrageous scenes of carnage ever committed to a mainstream film. It could even rival the finale of Dead Alive. Yet, I never found myself fully able to enjoy what was happening on screen, because of the film's abrupt transition into the final act.
With all these talks of re-edits and an 84 minute running time, I know this can't be the film that the people behind this film originally intended to present to the public. However, when it comes to reviewing a film, I have to judge a film based on what's presented to me, not what I thought it could have been. Nurse 3D starts out as pure unadulterated fun, but when the credits rolled, I walked away from the film feeling unsatisfied, as though I didn't get to see a complete film. [R] 84 mins.
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